WE KNOW WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT...WE THINK
We here in the TJR Thought Lab wanted to take a new look at our NFL Power Rankings. Everyone loves the Saints. The Broncos are the league’s biggest surprise. Peyton Manning has the Colts undefeated. That old guy has that purple team at 6-1…and both the Pats and the Steelers are going to be tough again.
So we decided to have a little fun with this week’s rankings by taking a gander at the dregs of the NFL. Hapless. Pathetic. Woeful. Awful. Say what you want. They all apply to these teams.
Truth is, when we thought really hard about it, determining an order for the league’s worst teams was more difficult than settling on one for those at the head of the class. Without further ado, here’s our best shot at the league’s Bottom 5.
Pro Football
#32: Talk about embarrassing. These 3 teams are so horribly inept that it’s impossible to distinguish one from the other. One man’s trash is another man’s…well, trash in this case. The Browns, Rams and Bucs have a combined record of 1-20. And that 1 win was a Browns 6-3 stinker over the Bills in which QB Derek Anderson completed 2 of 17 passes. Can you say “contraction”?
#29: What a complete and utter mess. And that’s just off the field. Head coach Jim Zorn was stripped of his play calling duties by the EVP of Football Operations who promptly handed them over to a guy – and this is no joke – who just weeks earlier was calling out BINGO at a senior citizens home. On the field has been almost as awful. Despite becoming the first team in history to open the season with 6 straight games against winless opponents, the ‘Skins are 2-5 with those 2 wins coming against…you guessed it the Rams and Bucs.
#28: We’re still trying to figure out how these teams (2-12 combined) each managed to win a game. Then we looked it up. Yep. They both beat the Redskins. Prior to facing the Redskins, the Lions had lost 19 straight regular season games; the Chiefs had lost 16 of its previous 17.
#26:Let’s see. Where do we start? How about with the head coach breaking an assistant’s jaw with a punch. Or we could talk about JaMarcus Russell’s historically bad season (1 of 3 QB in history to have both a completion % (46.3) and QB rating (47.2) under 50 through 7 weeks. Oh, and how’d that whole passing up Michael Crabtree thing work out for the Raiders? In 7 games this season, Raiders 1st round pick Darrius Heyward-Bay has 4 catches for 64 yards. After a 10 week holdout, Crabtree suited up for the 49ers on Sunday and caught 5 passes for 56 yards. Sounds about right for the Raiders. You really can’t make this crap up.
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